Marriage (النكاح)

Opening verse

وَأَنكِحُوا الْأَيَامَىٰ مِنكُمْ وَالصَّالِحِينَ مِنْ عِبَادِكُمْ وَإِمَائِكُمْ

Meaning: Marry off those among you who have no spouse. (24 An-Nur: 32)

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1️⃣ The family and marriage

• The family is the foundation of Islamic life; some scholars call Islam "a family-centred religion".
• The family = a small society; the first seed of the larger society. Only if the seed is healthy will the tree be healthy.
• The Quran explains family law in detail, linking it with iman; it also speaks about the families of the prophets.
• Marriage is the way of the prophets.

Hadith (Bukhari)

O young people! Whoever among you is able should marry, for it lowers the gaze and guards chastity. Whoever is not able should fast, for it is a protection for him.

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2️⃣ The legal status of marriage

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3️⃣ The purposes of marriage (from the Shari'ah's point of view)

(1) Producing righteous offspring

• The long-term survival of the human race; producing good dhurriyyah (offspring).
• Beyond simply having children, building a long line of descendants → the mechanism by which the human race continues.

(2) Bringing peace of body and mind

• 30 Ar-Rum: 21 – Among Allah's signs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves so that you may find peace in them, and He placed love and mercy between you.
• The Quran describes the bond of husband and wife with the word "sakan" (السكن – tranquillity).
• Peace of mind → greater effectiveness, many times more productivity.
• Peace of body = protection from sins, crimes, deadly diseases and social ills.
• A married person = "muhsan" (المحصن); this comes from the word "hisn" (a fortress) → marriage is a fortress of protection.
• "Whoever marries has established half of his religion" (the textbook gives no source for this).

(3) Creating a good social structure

• The family of husband and wife is the basis of the social structure.
• 25 Al-Furqan: 74 – Our Lord! Grant us comfort of the eyes through our wives and offspring, and make us leaders of the God-fearing (muttaqin).
• Hadith (Bukhari): The leader is responsible for the people, the man for his family, the woman for the home and children; each will be questioned.

Marriage that helps fulfil these purposes = 'ibadah (worship).

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4️⃣ Nikah (النكاح) – meaning

• From the Arabic word "nakaha".
• A contract, made with God-consciousness, by which a man and a woman gain the status of husband and wife religiously, legally and socially.
• Because it takes place in the name of Allah before witnesses → 'ibadah + social contract.
• Only a man and woman who are ajnabi (non-mahram, "strangers") to each other may marry; marriage between mahrams is haram.

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5️⃣ Mahram (المحرم)

A close relative whom one is not permitted to marry. Two kinds: temporary mahram and permanent mahram.

The textbook's list orders them "1. temporary, 2. permanent", and then calls the permanent mahram "the first kind" – confirm with your teacher.

Permanent mahram – three causes

Blood relationship | Relationship by marriage | Relationship by breastfeeding (milk)

(The lists below are from a man's point of view.)

(a) Blood relationship

1. Mother, mother's mother … (upwards)
2. Daughters, daughters' children … (downwards)
3. Sisters (children of one's own parents) and their children … (downwards)
4. Children of one's own grandparents – this stops at the first level: one may not marry the sisters of one's mother or father (aunts); but one may marry their children (cousins).

(b) Relationship by marriage

1. Wife's mother, her mother's mother … (upwards)
2. Daughters of a wife with whom the marriage was consummated, and their children … (downwards)
3. Son's wife, son's son's wife, daughter's son's wife … (downwards)
4. Father's wife

(c) Relationship by breastfeeding

Mahram status also arises from drinking the milk of a woman who is not one's own mother:

1. The woman who gave the milk
2. Her mother
3. Her husband's mother
4. Her sister
5. Her husband's sister
6. Her husband's children, and their children
7. A sister related through drinking milk from the same woman

Conditions for breastfeeding to create mahram status

• The milk was drunk when the child was under two years old
• It was drunk directly from the breast
• At least five sucklings (separate feeds) were taken

Those forbidden temporarily

1. Two full sisters at the same time
2. A woman and her paternal aunt at the same time
3. A woman and her maternal aunt at the same time
4. A woman who is already someone's wife
5. A woman divorced with three talaqs – temporarily, for her first husband
6. A mushrik woman
7. Adulteresses – until they repent and become completely clean of it

Those one may marry = ajnabis (الأجنبي); those one may not = mahrams.

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6️⃣ The 4 essentials (fard) for a valid nikah

Conditions for the groom

• Being a Muslim
• Not already having four wives at the same time
• Being ajnabi to the bride
• Not being in ihram for Hajj

Conditions for the bride

• Being a Muslim or one of the Ahl al-Kitab (أهل الكتاب – People of the Book)
• Not being another man's wife
• Not being in 'iddah
• Not being in ihram for Hajj

Ijab (الإيجاب) – the offer

• The words said by the wali to declare that he is giving the bride to the groom.
• The words "ankahtuka" (أنكحتك) and "zawwajtuka" (زوجتك) are best; it may also be done in a language that is understood.

Qabul (القبول) – the acceptance

• The words said by the groom to declare that he accepts the bride given by the wali.
• There must be no delay between the ijab and the qabul.

Wali (الولي)

• Hadith (Ibn Majah): A woman cannot marry herself off; a woman cannot act as wali for another woman.
• A marriage made without the wali's permission is invalid.

Those entitled to be wali (in order):

1. Father
2. Father's father
3. Full brother
4. Paternal half-brother
5. Full brother's son
6. Paternal half-brother's son
7. Father's full brother (paternal uncle)
8. His son
9. Father's paternal half-brother
10. His son
11. Grandfather's full brother
12. Grandfather's paternal half-brother
13. Their sons
14. The judge (hakim)

• If the earlier one is absent or loses his eligibility, the next one takes the right.

The 6 qualifications of a wali: Muslim, male, adult, of sound mind, free, not in ihram.

Witnesses (الشاهد – shahid)

• A nikah without a wali and two witnesses is batil (invalid).
• Conditions: the wali's conditions + knowing the language of the contract + the faculties of speech, hearing and sight.

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7️⃣ Mahr (المهر)

• The obligatory gift given by the groom to the bride at marriage; giving it is wajib.
• Quran: Give the women you marry their mahr graciously.
  • The textbook gives this as (4 An-Nisa': 5); this meaning about mahr is generally found in 4 An-Nisa': 4 – confirm with your teacher.
• It may be given as money, goods, property or a service.
• Some scholars say that making the contract without stating the mahr is makruh.

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8️⃣ Walimah (الوليمة)

• In general, a feast for a happy occasion; in usage, the feast given on behalf of the groom after the marriage, once the couple have come together.
• Ruling: sunnah mu'akkadah (a strongly recommended sunnah).
• Giving it after the couple come together is best; giving it after the contract is also acceptable.
• According to the husband's means; simple, avoiding extravagance and waste.
• It is best to invite relatives, friends, neighbours, poor and rich without discrimination.

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Key terms

النكاح • السكن • الذرية • المحصن • المحرم • الإيجاب • القبول • الولي • الشاهد • الأجنبي • أهل الكتاب • أنكحتك • زوجتك • المهر • الوليمة

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Quick revision

• 24:32 – marry off those who have no spouse.
• Sunnah (for those with means); wajib (if there is fear of sin).
• 3 purposes: righteous offspring, peace of body and mind (sakan, 30:21), social structure (25:74).
• Permanent mahram – blood, marriage, breastfeeding.
• Breastfeeding: under 2 years, from the breast, at least 5 sucklings.
• 4 essentials: bride and groom, ijab–qabul, wali, 2 witnesses.
• Order of walis: from the father … to the judge (hakim) – 14.
• Mahr – wajib; walimah – sunnah mu'akkadah.