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Opening verse
وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِّتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً ۚ إِنَّ فِي ذَٰلِكَ لَآيَاتٍ لِّقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ
Meaning: Among His signs is that He created for you wives from among yourselves so that you may live with them in peace, and He placed love and affection between you; in this are signs for people who reflect. (30 Ar-Rum: 21)
1️⃣ Introduction
- Marriage = the seed of family life; just as a good seed takes deep root, grows into a tree and gives good fruit, a good family and society grow from the union of a righteous man and woman.
- Islam has made the lawful union of a righteous couple an act of 'ibadah.
- That union, made in the name of Allah, is strong and firm; it is filled with love, affection and mercy.
- What a model family should give: contentment, happiness, peace and comfort of the eyes.
- 25 Al-Furqan: 74 – "Our Lord! Grant us comfort of the eyes through our wives and offspring."
2️⃣ The goal of the family – Paradise
| Verse | Meaning |
|---|---|
| 66 At-Tahrim: 6 | O believers! Protect yourselves and your families from the Fire |
| 39 Az-Zumar: 15 | The real losers are those who bring loss on themselves and their families on the Day of Judgement; that is the clear loss |
| 52 At-Tur: 26–27 | When we were among our families in the world, we feared (the Hereafter); Allah was gracious to us and saved us from the scorching punishment (the words of the people of Paradise) |
3️⃣ The model husband / head of the family
- A good husband to his wife, and a model father to his children.
- When he enters the house he greets them with a cheerful face and says salam.
- The Prophet ﷺ to Anas (RA): "My dear son! When you go in to your family, say salam; it will be a blessing for you and for your family." (The textbook gives no source.)
- When his wife is tired he lends a helping hand, and comforts her with gentle words.
- With religious commitment he guides his wife and children towards spiritual growth.
- 20 Ta-Ha: 132 – (O Prophet!) Command your family to pray, and be patient in it.
- He respects his wife's feelings and corrects faults with dignity and kindness.
- He keeps a balance between his parents, wife and children; he wrongs none of them; he is good to his parents.
- 4 An-Nisa': 34 – Men are in charge of (responsible for) women, because of the distinction Allah has given them and because they spend (on them).
The Prophet's ﷺ family life – the model
- Good relations with his wives, humour, love and a gentle nature.
- He ran races with 'A'ishah (RA).
- He ate whatever food was put before him; he never found fault with food.
- He took part in the household work.
4️⃣ The hadith on responsibility (Bukhari)
"Each of you is a shepherd (responsible), and each of you will be questioned about his responsibility."
| Person | Responsible for |
|---|---|
| The ruler | The citizens |
| The head of the family | His wife and children |
| The wife | Her husband's home |
5️⃣ The model wife
- With Allah's pleasure as her goal, she obeys her husband and keeps him content.
- Hadith (Ibn Majah): "A woman who dies while her husband is pleased with her will enter Paradise."
Note: This hadith is also reported by Tirmidhi; some hadith scholars have criticised its chain. The textbook cites Ibn Majah – confirm the grading with your teacher.
6️⃣ Parents and children
- Children who feel their parents' love grow up healthy and strong.
- When Fatimah (RA) came to the Prophet ﷺ, he would stand up, welcome her, kiss her and seat her in his own place; Fatimah (RA) did the same for him; even when he was ill before his death he welcomed and kissed her. (Bukhari)
- A good father spends generously on his family; he is not miserly.
- Hadith (Bukhari): The best dinar a person spends is the dinar he spends on his family.
- Giving children opportunities for good education; the parents too keep learning.
- Being aware of what the children search for, read and write; guiding them to use the media properly for good things.
7️⃣ Neighbours and blood relatives
- They keep good relations with neighbours; they wish for their neighbours what they wish for themselves; they share joys, comfort them in hardship, cover their faults and live without causing them trouble.
- They maintain blood ties and strengthen relationships.
- Hadith (Bukhari): The deeds that lead into Paradise – not associating partners with Allah, establishing prayer, giving zakat, and keeping the ties of kinship.
- Keeping ties with blood relatives brings increase in provision and in lifespan.
Memory tip
Verses of the model family: 30:21 (love) • 25:74 (comfort of the eyes) • 66:6 (protection from the Fire) • 20:132 (command to pray) • 4:34 (being in charge)
Quick revision
- The union of a righteous couple = 'ibadah.
- Goal: Paradise; 66:6 – protect the family from the Fire.
- Husband: salam, a cheerful face, help, commanding prayer, balance.
- The Prophet ﷺ – races with 'A'ishah; never faulting food; helping with housework.
- Wife: a woman who dies with her husband pleased with her enters Paradise (Ibn Majah).
- The best dinar – spending on the family (Bukhari).
- Keeping blood ties → increase in provision and lifespan.